28.11.10

This cat has claws! #1


We all love a regular blog feature, don't we? I figured if I can't commit to my weekly Tuesday tips at the moment, maybe I can introduce a new feature that comes a little easier. In ye olde fashion biz, everyone is so quick to heap praise on things left right and centre. As a blogger, isn't it my job to derail this just a bit?
So this new feature will be me speaking my mind on matters of the wardrobe. I'm hoping it will be quite therapeutic, as I have a lot of pent up uni-anger to unleash and if I don't take it out on the blog, it will be the boyfriend!

Round one, ding ding!

Anyone else think the H&M x Lanvin collection is quite frankly horrific? There's tacky-ironic and there's just tacky. I know I sound like the cliche snarky writer right now, but I'm genuinely bemused! At what point did H&M think this would suit their target market? Even the fashion-forward customer would surely laugh at this? There are one or two pretty normal dresses in the collection, but even they look like Rare knock-offs at best. I feel bad because I think Alber seems like he'd make a really sweet uncle (I'm not a very good bitch am I?) but there is just no excuse for this:









I did wonder whether it was just the styling that let Uncle Elbaz down, so I checked out the individual item shots, then this happened:





If anyone can justify these designs to me in the comments box, I am ready and awaiting your guidance. Where are my retinas to go from here?

Confused in Kent,

68 comments:

  1. haah this whole post cracked me up! love you for not bigging it up, I liked some of the first items to come out and quite fancied a lipstick. But some of them are awful, everyone talks about how much they love "that" Yellow dress but honestly if I saw somebody wearing it i'd just think....'why?' xx

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  2. thank-you, gem! i personally can't see what all of the hype about his h&m collection is about either. there are only a few things i would camp outside for and that certainly is not one of them.

    jazmine. x

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  3. THANK YOU!
    I despise despise DESPISE this collaboration. I have no idea who okay these designs, and quite frankly, they give me a headache. They are odious in every way, shape and form and if a MODEL looks horrifc wearing them, what chance do we mere mortals have?

    I think H&M are definitely cashing in on the general public's desperation to own a "Lavin" item.

    Phew. Good to get it off my chest!

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  4. I'm not a fan, they didn't have any in Cardiff and even if they did it wouldn't fit me anyway so I was not interested in it at all. Every fashion blog seemed to mention it and say how amazing it was. Yawn.

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  5. i would agree with you that its the styling! and them awful, just awful tights and wig hair styles. But i think there are alot of people out there that will buy them just because of who has put their name to them.
    Stevie x

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  7. Cowbiscuits - I'm kinda late on the Lanvin-wagon, only checked it out in the last couple of days and can't really see what all the Twitter hype was about. And your 'why' comment made me lol!

    Jazz - Yeah the ratio of nice to crap items is not good at all!

    Binia - You made some hilarious points there miss, I think I'll enlist you to write my next bitchy post for me! You summed the collection up better than me, and it's so true that people just want to buy the name.

    Gem - Yeah, utter yawn! Although I guess everyone's entitled to an opinion. Not my fault it's a crap one! ;)

    Stevie - True dat!

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  8. To be honest all i really wanted were the carrier bags, I loved the illustrations. Now they're on ebay for silly money...
    I did like the black ruffle dress but it was £99 and I probably wouldn't wear it that much, I don't really do 'party' dresses per se. The accessories weren't really to my taste with too much going on. My fave collab was Comme des Garcons, I wish I'd gone to more effort trying to acquire the pieces!

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  9. It is, what you make of it (like most things in life).

    For example, this chick looks stunning - http://bardotinblue.com/?p=5041

    I don't think the whole collection is horrible at all!

    x

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  10. I totally agree. I spotted a coat with a stripey faux fur collar which had threads coming off it everywhere. It looked as if someone sewed it with their eyes shut. Totally hideous and yet it was retailing for £200!!!

    I saw a girl on the tube the day the collection came out with about six HUGE Lavain hearts H&M bags. Goodness knows what she actually bought, my money is that she flogged it all on ebay.

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  11. Red fishnets with an orange dress?

    The clutch reminds me of Paul's Boutique. This is a very bad thing.

    I really loved the super puffy dress though. It was a green-ish colour and all-kinds-of-amazing?

    x

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  12. Couldn't agree more! Although my opinion is probably biased because even the proper Lanvin collections aren't to my taste at all and I find it hard to understand why everyone gushes over them. The thing that annoyed me most about the H&M collection was the prices - £150-200 for dresses = not accessible and definitely cashing in on the affiliation with such a big designer name. When I bought stuff from the Cavalli collaboration a few years back, the prices were only slightly higher than regular H&M. The styling in those pics is DIABOLICAL and that pink dress is just... I have no words. I have no doubt that very, very few, if any, of the customers who bought that as a 'Lanvin for H&M' item would have looked at it with anything but horror if it was just a 'H&M' item.

    This is a VERY good idea for a regular feature, reading people slagging things off is so much more fun than reading rave reviews! I'm already looking forward to future installments! x

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  13. I liked some of the stuff in the collection, but then there was other stuff (like the clutch bag you've posted!) that just made me thing wtf?!
    This was a collection I liked some bits of, but it wasn't worth camping out for.

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  14. Ha this was such a great post, i was cracking up laughing so much. And completely agree the world seems to have gone gaga for this slightly gaga-esque collection. Very strange ha. Look forward to reading your next feature post x

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  15. I. Agree.

    I didn't even understand why people were excited about this collab!

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  16. Aha, I went in to H&M on the day it launched to have a look, no massive queues for it in France! Everything was all "raw edges", which is fine sometimes, but these were basically disintegrating and trailing fluff everywhere, terrible quality. And most of it is ugly and unflattering.

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  17. I am absolutely with you on this one! People will buy anything if they think they're getting a label for cheaps! I have a lot of time for Rumi Neely but her recent post featuring this collection actually made me cringe! Thought perhaps I just wasn't cool enough to grasp it! Haha.

    I don't often get my little mitts on many designer dresses but I did have to pack a shipment of Lanvin dresses for an internship I did - it was a static electricity nightmare, it was crackling! So it's not only the collaboration versions that are a bit ewww.

    x

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  18. I suspect that it's a joke. All of the people who can afford actual Lanvin are laughing at us mere mortals, but we're too busy queueing up at bumfuck o' clock to notice.

    (Disclaimer: I didn't queue. Or look at the collection online until days after it had come out.)

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  19. Errrr, I so agree, especially with the Rare bit, that was exactly my thought. I think I liked one thing, though I cant remember what it was, not exactly special! X

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  20. This post was hilarious. I hadn't seen the collection before and I find it a little... obnoxious! Also - what is up with that dress in the second photo? And that awful zebra print coat? BLERGH.

    X

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  21. HAHAHA totally agree! i thought there was one or two nice dresses but most of it did look pretty manky. great post :) x

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  22. I agree completely! If this was going to work 1% more they should have done it in the summer. Some of the mens items were nice (a coat?) but nothing out of the ordinary! The only good that will come out of this is the profits people will be making on eBay! x

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  23. Agreed. The whole H & M x Lanvin collection looks like the sort of stock you'd see at my local indoor market next to the elasticated pleated floral granny skirts. How the hell is it wearable? Or viewable for that matter?! What's with the whole dressing the woman up like a zebra thing?! Bleugh. By the way, love the new weekly feature! I cannot wait to vent some more with your next post (:

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  24. yes i too agree and think a vast majority of the collection is horrendous, the few things that are simple and decent (in my opinion) i wouldn't buy. it's starting to look more and more like tulle vomit. the more pieces i see.
    but we all have different taste!

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  25. I dont like elitism, I found the way they released the items elitist. Only if you live near certain stores or can drag yourself out of bed at god know how early. no ta

    http://may-velvetmorning.blogspot.com/

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  26. I totally don't get it either. Like you say they look like knock-offs of cheap companies with a ridiculous price tag.

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  27. I completely agree with you! I really dislike the whole collection, and find it way too tacky!! xo

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  28. I agree with you too the only thing I saw that I kinda liked from the collection was the 50's style net dress that they did in different colours but I like it mainly because I like the 50's silhouette more than I like the dress itself. Lookinf forward to future posts! x

    Kittenish Behaviour Blog

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  29. it looks like river island on a bad day!

    kind of disturbingly tacky! i wish top designers would stop doing high street collaborations! ruins the brand and takes away exclusivity!

    http://incfashion.blogspot.com/

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  30. nice to read a non-worship based post on this collection.. i dont get all the hoohaa, its really not that great! h&m know people will buy it for the name, quite frankly it takes the p*ss a little bit because some of the pieces are god awful- especially that gilet that youve posted- had not seen that until now and i am NOT a fan!!!! xx

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  31. You know what I got so caught up in the hype, I loved it (not all but a lot) and when I saw the catwalk show I full more in love ......but than I heard about the U.S launch and saw pictures on Ebay and twitter ...and it does not look like the catwalk or the press pictures apart from one tee it's just H&M with the Lanvin label slapped on. I got up at 6am to be online for the launch but after checking Ebay I want back to bed, I am really gutted that they did not do something more casual. I mean I don't get buying a £100 dress to wear it once, so apart from one cute tee and after the hype I felt let down and a bit gutted. It was the same with the Mac collection the latest one, I got so hyped but than I saw it in a normal picture and was like ' oh'. I was never a fan of the jackets :/ just no. I think I will stick to non collections and steer clear of the hype ...it's not worth it anyway Great post Gem x

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  32. The only thing that I saw that was at all good was a yellow dress. However I didn't feel it jsutified the price.

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  33. oooh I love that clutch! xx

    Oh and if you haven't already, don't forget to enter my Zoemou Necklace Giveaway @ http://thriveonnovelty.blogspot.com/2010/11/zoemou-necklace-giveaway.html

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  34. ooo i dont know .. i can see myself sat in one of these items.. while making meself a giant G&T and forgiving my husband his 10th affair as he throws a bit more money at me!!
    they look very wag chav tastic i think!

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  35. You know when I first heard about this collaboration I was excited. For me it was just going to be really well cut garments, and a higher quality of material. And then I saw the yellow dress. And everyone round me was gushing. Now I like trash more than most, but the collection was far from what I expected. Drop waists? No. That ruffled pink monstrosity? No. It just looked very very cheap. There were a very select few items that didn't give me the heave...but for the price tag...no, I can get better in TK MAXX. So glad it's not just me!
    xo

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  36. OH MY GOD I DO AGREE WITH YOU, so much.

    I was already tired of the mistery they created 'round the collection, then I went to see it just yesterday in a shop in Florence and...I felt stupid. Can anyone really want to buy a dress (I'm talking bout the tulle one) that has 15euros of tulle on, with a simple bow (estimated price: 2euro) and pay it 199euros just because they wrote Lanvin on it?
    Are you f*****g kidding me?

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  37. HAHAH i love this. I completely agree, I've been reading many a blog post going on about how amazing this collaboration is, and thinking 'are we looking at the same clothes?'. So glad someones dared to say they dont like it xx

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  38. Im glad someones finally speaking the troofs! ha-ha. Yeh theres nothing I like in the collection, but then, thats the same with a lot of collabs!

    www.cupcakecouture.co.uk

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  39. I thought I was the only person who wasn't drooling over it and queueing up to get a horrible dress!!

    Love the idea of this feature.

    xx

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  40. So agree, I don't understand the hype at all. There were some nice pieces, but lots of it was pretty tacky... and now that everyone has seen each piece about a million times online, why would you want to wear any of it?

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  41. Bwahaha I totally agree, there was nothing I'd wear in that whole collection! I have to say on the whole H&M's collaborations haven't wowed me so far...disappointing as I usually love H&M with a passion! xx

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  42. I AM SO GLAD that I am not alone in hating the collection.

    Can't wait to see what else this feature brings x

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  43. Oh how I love a good bitch! Yay for this post.

    Everything I've seen from the collection is just plain nasty. Oh no, I make an exception for the grey dress thing which was quite pretty but horrendously overpriced and frankly nothing I haven't seen before anyway.

    Plus I'm pretty sure you could track down vintage Lanvin (or other, better, designers) for the same price or considerably cheaper than this vile tat, so why are people getting so sucked in by it?!

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  44. Great idea for a feature gem! I love bloggers who can be brutally honest - would much rather read genuine and fresh opinions rather than the same arse licking gush all over again.

    I'm no fashionista, and to be honest there are so many designers, and collections, and clothes that I see people going crazy over. And I always actually end up feeling a bit left out/unfashionable because I look at it and dont 'get' it. I think its easy for people to get caught up in the hype rather than the ACTUAL item of clothing they are looking at. The pictures above make me want to vom, lol. So thank you for sharing your honest opinion :) xx

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  45. Brilliant! I love that you've just come right out and said what you think!
    But, I have to disagree... There are some great wee items in amongst the collection, but like ALL collections, there are going to be more than a few disasters.
    I have no idea what the quality or fit is like as I didn't bother buying anything, but if someone wanted to buy me THAT yellow dress, I'd wear it with pride.
    Alot of it reminded me of Betsey Johnson - over the top tacky - I love it!

    Can't wait to read your next installment!

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  46. hahaha you're right it's..hideous but nobody dares speak out! I'm glad you did :)

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  47. Brilliant, Gem! My only positive thought about the Lanvin collection is that it's not quite as tacky-nasty as the Sonia Rykiel one was. And there's some red dress that a few bloggers already have that I think is kind of awesome. But otherwise ugly big time! Please keep calling the bullshit! And can I suggest some topics?
    1. Chanel (especially jewellery and fake tattoos
    2. furry yeti costumes (oops, I guess that's Chanel again)
    3. leopard overkill? ?

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  48. Haha I like your rant! Although I did like a few of the more simple pieces from the collection (mainly the tshirts and things that you can actually wear!) I wasn't too impressed with it. Although tbh I've never been impressed with any of the H&M collaborations - remember the awful Madonna one?? x

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  49. The most I could get out of this would be the leopard print tights. They are as wearable and adaptable as this collection gets. Lanvin jumping on the collaboration bandwagon without wearing a seatbelt, I think. jazzy ♥

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  50. Lol I'm so glad to see someone write this, do you not feel in fashion we are constantly told what is 'in' and what isn't? And to be honest half the people who buy this are going to look back and groan like my mother does over the 80s! The only thing I thought looked half decent was the big ball of tutu and even that was only to indulge in a childhood dream of owning a disney princess dress, not a good look when your 24!!!!

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  51. Haha your comments are cracking me up whilst I'm in the midst of cooking my brain on Photoshop.
    Thanks for cheering me up with your gorgeous pessimism! :D
    x

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  52. Totally agree as well! I never thought this collab would work to begin with, as the whole idea of Lanvin is that the cut and fabric is high-end and expensive and even then its really just a load of drape and ruffles which, when done badly, is really just a load of old hat!

    Love this feature anyway, definitely glad to see someone else who likes to have a good old rant about things! Looking forward to the next one!

    Alexandra xxx
    sheseverybodyelsesgirl.blogspot.com

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  53. THANK YOU!
    This Collection Makes Me Cringe. Looks like H&M Could Have Done This Themselves.

    BTW Have You Seen The Gap x Valentino collection? Just Dreadful.

    Jen xx
    jjnoir.blogspot.com

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  54. thank you for calling it out! finally some sense

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  55. Thank you for saying what I've been thinking! Ugh, it's just terrible. Have you seen the t-shirts? They are so stupid. I live in Ohio, and though I haven't stopped in my local H&M yet, I have a feeling that these looks didn't quite catch on with the midwestern crowd. At least maybe then I'll be able to score some Lanvin on clearance.

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  56. It is pretty... bonkers, even by my standards!
    I dunno, it would be nice to see the clothes up close but if I did fork out anything on a (drunken late night shopping) whim I dunno if it would ever see the light of day! Not that I could afford it anyhoo...

    I love this new rant feature!! More please. Much more interesting than every single blogger banging on about how amazing everything is.

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  57. HA! Love the new feature.
    You are so right though. Much looks like the sort of things my young cousin has in her dressing up box. This is not a good thing.
    A pal of mine checked out the collection in person, and informs me that for designer dresses, they are badly made with raw seams and the like, but silly expensive when you consider it is still H&M!
    I love H&M normally, but I do think this a miss here.

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  58. HAHA SOMETIMES YOUR POSTS MAKE ME LITERALLY LAUGH OUT LOUD... LOL IN PLANET INTERNET

    Laura

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  59. This is probably the only negative comment I've seen about the Lanvin collection. I thought it looked interesting but the prices are a bit ridiculous, I've yet to see the collection in store so until then, my opinion will have to wait.

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  60. Uhm, I think it's all ugly.
    And a little bit tacky.
    And garish.

    I could go on.

    x

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  61. TOOOO funny. 'And then this happened... BLEURGHH!'
    Simply hideous.
    xxx

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  62. Finally!! Why are so many bloggers banging on about this crap? When I first saw some stuff I thought exactly the same the bags tacky and don't justify the price tag! Sometimes I wonder whether bloggers write about designers etc like this just 'because' they are designer. Maybe its just me as I don't buy designer labels, my mere mortal wage would hate me! Great post, you should totally do a rant more often! There's nothing worse than trying a new mascara or lippy to find its absolutely rubbish! X

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  63. I like the *idea* of some of the items, like the raw edges and big ruffles, but in real life they don't really work...There's a big rack of dresses and coats left in one of the Glasgow branches, which surprised me since so many people had been going on about it.
    The big petticoat-like dress looks a bit iffy too-I've yet to see a picture where it looks like it fits the person wearing it. It always looks a bit baggy round the underarms...

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  64. Honestly we loved the film but wasn't blown over by the designs, Lanvin is one of our favorite designers but this didn't translate as well as it could have, too much h&m not enough Lanvin!!

    The main reason why we love this post is because you have an opinion! so many fashion bloggers just 'love' everything and anything and we love that you just say what you think and in my opinion that is what blogging should be about!

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  65. Blurgh! Yeah, not much to love about those clothes I think! Knew there was a reason I avoided high street stores... :)

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Thanks for commenting! ♥